When We Fall
by write and read forever
Summary: Cordelia Carstairs has always been in love with James Herondale. But he hasn't always been in love with her. Grace Cartwright is out to break his heart and please her mother Tatina Blackthorn is out to save her son, Jesse but to save him, she needs to kill five young shadowhunters. Lucy Herondale is in love with Jesse and knows he's not dead. not everyone gets to be happy R
1. Chapter 1

**Hi! I'm Write and read forever I write A LOT of TMI fanfic! For quite some time now, I have been shipping Jordelia! I also have had a question about them answered by Cassie! **

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**-write and read forever**

Chapter 1

The Party

Paris, 1903

Anyone's POV

Cordeila Carstairs sat in her room, eyeing the blue and silver ballgown that her mother, Colette had laid gently on her bed over an hour ago. She knew she had to change eventually, slip on the corset, slip the dress, slip on the small silver pumps, comb and try to manage her bobbed, curly red hair. Try to do something to bring the color in her pale, sullen face. Try to be interested in everything and anything Fredrick Aldertree (OC) says and does. She hated him, but her mother was quite fit on her marrying him, because know one else had any interest in her. She would pretend to smile, pretend to giggle and understand. Watch as Lucy gave her pitied looks and Cordelia would face her biggest fear, the thing she cried herself to sleep every night because of. James Herondale and Grace Cartwright. Everyone loved them, adored them, but Cordelia, who had been madly inlove with him since she was ten. She watched him adore Grace, practically drool over her. she was beautiful.

Long white curly hair, perfect ice blue eyes, pale skin, perfect body. Image of grace and perfection. It killed Cordelia. She longed to be the one who reflected in Jamie's perfect amber eyes. Cordelia didn't realize she was crying until she felt tears hit her lap. She wiped them quickly, grabbing the Cortana out of the vanity drawer, the blade gleamed in her hands. She held onto it, as she sobbed at the numbness in her heart. The blade sliced her hands, but she didn't care.

Cordelia Carstairs was a broken hearted girl.

An hour later, she was perfectly dressed and done up. Wiping the Cortana off, she slipped it into the shelve on her thigh. She pretended to smile as her brother walked down the stairs, Alistair Carstairs was quite the young man, looking like his father, Elias and graceful like their mother Colette, she was the image of a perfect gentleman. His lovely girlfriend, Helena Braham (OC) walked with her arm lace around his. The two made the image of a perfect couple walk away crying. They were absolutely perfect. Helena's gold hair was piled upon her hair in delicate curls, secured with lovely pearl pins, her dress adored with pearls that made the pink satin jump in grace.

Cordelia and her brother had a rockey relationship, and hardly agreed on anything. He didn't agree with her choices and often got angry at her for her childness. He only wanted best for her, and he didn't mean to hurt her feelings, he just did.

"You look lovely, Cordelia." He smiled, trying to cheer his sister up, he knew going to the Herondale's parties was always a painful thing for her. Cordelia thanked him quietly, before heading to the carriage.

"Oh Alistar, I hate seeing her this way." Helena cooed, a sad look upon her face. "I know, but she has to learn that this is just the way it is." Alistar finished before pulling Helena into the second carriage.

Colette Carstairs sat a crossed her daughter. Trying to lift her spirits, but it was hard. Colette had her own problems, this was the first year that she would have to attended the party without her husband. Elias had died four months ago, although it was hard for the whole family, Colette was taking it the hardest.

Colette pulled at one of her long dark red curls, who matched her daughters, before sighing. "Dear, I promise it'll be okay. Just please, try for me and your father." she gave her a small smile. Cordelia, looked at her mother, tears threating to spill, before nodding, wiping them away for the second time that day.

Cordelia would try for her mother, and her whole family.

**like it! please please please review and follow the accounts I gave at beginning! thank! the more reviews that faster the next chapter! -write and read forever**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello! Another Chapter! Thank you Thank You Thank you for the wonderful reviews I received last night and this morning! I thank you and do hope you keep reviewing! Also! I'm sorry for the spelling errors, I was in a hurry last night!**

**-write and read forever**

Chapter 2

Attacks and Death

London, 1903

Lucie's POV

I sat in the library, not bothering to come out until Cordelia was here. James was wrong when he said that "Great Expectations" was a good book. It was horrid, with having to hear about Pip's sister, and his grand love for Estella, whom would never love him back.

It reminded me of my grand parabatai, Cordy, whom I worried about a lot of the times.

I knew she was sad quite often, and I tried to cheer her up, but it was quite useless. She was in a dark place, far away from anyone who was anything near happy. "Oh Cordy" Lucie sighed, closing her book and putting it on the table beside her. Just as she was about to get up, James appeared at the door frame. His golden eyes shined with curiosity. "What was that, Lucie? Please do tell." He smirked, before sitting on the chair next to her.

"Shouldn't you be somewhere, following Grace like a lost puppy?" she spat, angry at him suddenly, just thinking about him twisting Cordy's emotions made her snap at him. "Why must you be so mean to me? I quite honestly do not understand what I did." James looked at her with a desperate look on his face. "I wish I could tell you Jamie, but you don't understand. You never will. You hurt someone I deeply care about, and I can't, just, I'm sorry." Lucie stuttered on her words, watching James try to figure out whom he must have hurt. Before he could say anything, she was gone.

Lucie ran down the corridor, into her room. Locking her door, she sat on the floor, picking up the brush from her vanity on the way down. It had been her mothers, and now her own. Lucie looked at the silver back plate, finding her beautiful face sadly expressional. Upon seeing this, she immediately fixed it. Smiling, Lucie now grabbed the green satin dress that sat in her drawer for special occasions, and slipped it on. She threw on some black pumps, and fixed her dark brown hair in an elegant bun. She decided to do a little bit of blush and red lipstick. Then she was ready.

Walking down to the ballroom, she was met with Jamie again. He smiled at her, and she faked a smile back. He walked over to her, his tall figure slouched, and his gold bow messy. Lucie went to fix his tie, hating when people were messy. he smiled at her as she finished.

Both Lucie and James heard the carriage pull up. "Cordelia!" Lucie shouted before pulling up her dress a bit so she could run. James followed his younger sister, watching as her face lit up as soon as she laid eyes on the Carstairs carriage.

The first to get out were Alistars and Helena, arm and arm. James greeted them and Lucie gave the couple a warm hug. Helena gushed on about how pretty Lucie was, and Lucie returned the comment.

Then the second carriage pulled up, which would have held Elias, Colette and Cordeila, not Alistar, for he would and is with his love interest.

Colette walked out first, her graceful footsteps made a small clicking sound a crossed the marble floor. Lucie was stunned by the beauty and resemblance of Colette and Cordelia. Colette approached Lucie first, hugging her tight, like it was her own daughter, then hugged James. Cordeilia stepped out, her head bowed to the floor. Lucie jumped up and hugged her parabaitia tightly, hoping to take the pain away for just a moment. Cordelia was grateful for that.

"You look absolutely beautiful, Cordy." Lucie gushed, watching Cordelia's face get red. "I may look pretty, but you're by far the prettiest girl here."Cordelia smiled.

"Hello Delia, you look nice." James smiled, calling her by his pet name he had made for her when they were younger. "Thank you, as to you." she fought the urge to cringe and smiled instead. The air in the small room was getting tighter, because of them.

"Come along Cordy, the party has already started and I haven't yet made my appearance for the night." Lucie smiled pulling Cordelia's arm. Both girls made their way down to the party, leaving James alone. Alistar, Helena and Colette had already left.

Cordelia's POV

Lucie pulled me through the crowd, shouting excuse me's and I'm very sorry. Both of us found ourselves right in front of Tessa and Will, whom were chattering amongst themselves.

"Mum, Pap, the Carstairs are here." Lucie shouted over the music. Tessa and Will both looked at me and smiled brightly.

"Cordelia! Dear, you look quite beautiful. How have you been?" Tessa asked, pushing a piece of stray brown hair away from her face. "Good thank you, you look very beautiful too. How have you been?" I asked smiling at her. Tessa was defiantly one of my favorite people, and to be honest, I wished she had been my mother. "Thank you, Good, Where is your mother by any chance?" she asked I told her I wasn't quite sure and Tessa replied that she would go find her.

I said hello to Will and he smiled giving me a quick hug before rushing after Tessa. I wish I had a love like that. I scanned the room for James and found him standing on the wall, conversing with Matthew Fairchild. I was surprised to see that Grace hadn't arrived. Lucie came back with a glass of wine, which I accepted graciously. we both drank. That was until the scream.

Lucie and I both looked at each other, before dropping our wine glasses with a shatter. I picked up the blue dress enough so I could run, Lucie did the same. We sprinted and I unshielded the Cortana from its holder. I heard Lucie's electric whip buzz. Then I heard her call for James and Matthew. The next minute, they were both beside Lucie and I as we all sprinted outside. I held the Cortana out in front of me, feeling everything come to the surface. The sweat rolling down my neck, the air buzzing with the sound of the angels weapons, the screams that had rang into the darkness. I saw her first.

My mother laid, her hair sprawled around her head, it had come out of its updo. Pieces of her silver dress laid around. Her wide blue eyes were wide, in shock and fear. The worst of all was the blood, which flowed from the knife prodding from her chest. I screamed, before running to her. There were no demons anymore, only my dying mother.

"MUM!" I screamed, falling before her.

'Cordelia, oh darling, I'm so sorry. You're so beautiful you know that? I never told you that enough. Baby, your so pretty, just as pretty as the angel standing before me." my mother coughed, her voice horse in death.

"Momma, no please don't. please please stop, stop Momma. I love you so much. Father already left us, you can't, it's unfair." I sobbed, the makeup running down my face.

"Je Suis desole, il ya le feu dans votre Coeur, de l`utilister" my mother spoke, her French spoke beautifully. I sobbed even harder. Then I watched her eyes roll, and with that she died. I felt a hand on my back, and shrugged it away. "I'm going to go get Alistar, James Watch her." I heard Lucie say, before her boots clicked off. I hated Lucie at that moment.

"Delia, Delia, it's going to be okay. I promise." I felt James put a hand on my shoulder when he said that.

But it wasn't going to be okay.

My mothers last words were "I'm sorry, there is fire within your heart."

She knew.

**What did Colette know? Review and find out! Thanks- write and read forever**


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry for not updating in a while. But I'm back with yet another Tumblr.**

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**Okay bye!**

**-write and read forever**

Chapter 3

London Institute, 1903

Lucie's POV

I dashed down to the ballroom, pushing through the people to find Alistair. I spotted him dancing with Helena, and yelled his name. Alistair looked up and I waved, he whispered something to Helena and she smiled going to get wine or something.

"Lucie, what is it?" he asked gently, smiling at me. I could imagine how frantic I looked, and he sensed that.

"It's Cordelia, and your mother." I barely got out before Alistair was pulling out his sword and dashing outside. I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned to see my mother and father behind me. "Darling what is it?" My mother asked with a concerned look on her face. I could see Magnus Bane behind them, a look on his face that matched my mothers. "Where's Cordelia?" my father asked and I choked down a sob just thinking about her. I could feel her emotions, and they weren't good.

"Mum, Pap, You need to come outside with me, now." I said, and they nodded with questioning looks on their face. Magnus followed, worried no doubt. Cordelia and Magnus were very close as friends; he travelled to Paris most often to visit, being close to Colette. Once we got outside I could see that Jamie had been replaced with Alistar, who held onto Cordelia like she was a lifeline. She sobbed into his chest; I had never seen them so close. My mother let out a gasp, and my father held her close as she put her hands up to her mouth. I ran to Jamie, hugging him from the side. He gasp in his own surprise, and slowly hugged me back. I started to cry, letting out all the emotions that weren't mine. He rocked back and forth slowly, shushing me.

"I'm so sorry for what I said earlier. Oh James." I cried. "I know what you mean now, Lucie, its okay, I know." he said in a whisper. I felt the feeling slowing down into numbness, and I unbarred my head from James side to see Alistair let go of Cordelia. He stood up, and said something to Cordelia that I would never forget.

"Cordelia, you poor, poor girl. You need to wake up. Shadowhunters don't sob, they don't show emotions! Learn to be stronger, because now that Mother and Father are gone, where do you think you'll go? Not back home, the house belongs to me and Helena now, so where Cordelia? Where? You think you're so special, but your ordinary."" He yelled at her, making a public scene.

I could feel the numbness spreading in my chest; I knew that she was feeling that way. It was killing me, to feel this. James could tell, because he asked me what was wrong.

"He needs to stop yelling at her, Please." I choked out, holding my chest. As soon as I thought that, Helena marched out, looking murderous.

"Alistair Carstairs, you're possibly the cruelest man in all the shadowworld. Think before you speak." She said in a calm, deadly voice before going to pick up a crumpled Cordelia. I let go of Jamie and ran to Cordelia.

My mother came too, while James and Matthew went with my father inside. Alistair had fled, more than likely to think over his actions. Cordelia didn't cry like I would have, she just sat there, staring. I told everyone to leave for a moment; I needed it just to be us so I could get a better read on her emotions. They scattered and it was just me and her. Her dress was still blood splattered, even though they had removed her body and put it in the mini morgue in the inside.

"Oh please snap out of it, please for me." I whispered. I started to cry when she didn't answer. She did this occasionally, locked herself out of the world, but usually I was the only one allowed in. It was usually like a little storm, I would pass, but now it was like a hurricane, and when it stopped there would be damage in its past.

I wasn't expecting her to get up though, but she did. She started to run, taking off before I could stop it.

"Cordelia!" I yelled, but she was too fast for me to keep up. I ran back inside, I needed to get James and Matthew. We were going on a hunt.

-**please review and tell me what you think! thanks! –write and read forever**


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